August 26, 2006

as soon as i was online....>>>>
*sHe* i want tulip not rose. -B = f (PE) - sent 8/26/2006 2:23 PM:
When you are lonely
I wish you love.
When you are down
I wish you joy.
When you are troubled
I wish you peace.
When things are complicated
I wish you simple beauty.
When things are chaotic
I wish you inner silence.
When things look empty
I wish you hope.
-ms tulip-

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=) hm.....today went to town afta kompang.....ate at banquet amk b4 dat......played lan...which bore me to hell....hahah..not really...war craft was quite simple ar...so ok la.....

n at town that was a PUBLIC OFFERING and the item on offer was me..... a generous attempt by the gang to look for potential galfwens for me......leaving ma num on tissue papers ard marina sq....OMG.... paiseh nak mampos..... hahahah...

then the long walk ard town.....wen we reach esplanade.....bang!!!! ayu...... ma ex....hah...amek ko.....at first i was like ok.....then i felt like earth was pulling ma heart down to its core....the wind whispered along a song of emptiness.....felt like tearing.....for no reason....but thx to dhil, khai, meer n ayul....made me laugh...as usual....how long can i be sad wen i hv u guys....hahaa....
cam y eh......wat if played endlessly in ma head....like i do miss her....n wish i cud turn back time...n be more matured to woork things out wif u wen i had ur luv....n luved me for who i am......thank you.....

baby ive let u go,
but now i miss u so....

so we walk up town.....till orchard...then went home....had fun.....thank u guys for cheerin me up......if the day comes wen i fall in luv again.....i owe it to u....hahha....cam tul je.....tak dpt ar....
kk....tomolo hv to be at cheng san cc at 9.30 am....im gettin popular for ma lateness...haha....so beta tuck in now....nites....

August 24, 2006

blessings....

it comes in diffrent form.....for diff ppl...
the world is fair.....the person who utters these words are likely seen as crzy / insane...
tear flow down ma cheek as i feel blessed upon wif another's happiness....
im blesseds wif a strong heart to handle all this pain...smtimes i fall in luv wif pain that i simultaniously hurt ppl.....ppl whom i luv n cr for...... so is it ma fault....

im juz being plainly sincere rite now....honest....im hurt agin wif life suprises....
i lost again wif ma pathway.... i pain by the games of the heart.. i wish sm1 cud juz read it as it is well written on ma face....but often....ppl are blessed wif the capability to ignore such complexity of the heart thus they ignores wat has been put rite infront of them......

August 22, 2006

watched smallville season 5 till episod 20....OMG....lana really broke clark's heart, n mine.....how sad.....yeah n all tokin abt findin a gal....the one to share ur life wif.....wat for....it all boils up to pain n sorrow......

maybe a portion of it is worth....if the time is rite.....she will come....how cliche....lol

thus ma approach...i dont gv a damn...i keep maslf occupied....be me...n ENJOY!

tho life has taken a turn on me...not the smartest kid in class...but can say the worse.....i mite even fail ma first paper...... the line in life has juz be set rite.....its time for me to fail..... but i dun really feel down as i noe.....even pitfall......are steps to fufilling a dream.....

i was so down afta CCM paper...but dk cheered me up.....

MY DESTINY-Katherine Mcphee

evry mistake, evry wrg turn,
evry time i lost ma way....
lead me to this,
moment of bless tonite....

Finally i can break free...
Its all chgin in ma Destiny
dream come true...
its so funny that now i see...
how diff life turn out to be....

August 20, 2006

so tired of bein sick...thus i went out....to torture ma body.... ate swesens wif dhil meer ayul n khai,who only came in time to join us for ice cream.....

so afta dat we had long hrs slackin n playin pool...the usual kind of game......even if i win ma opponent wud say its luck....wat can i say.....lol

thus afta we all had our tournements.....we walk down town.....then caught a match not ma regular thing....but it was quite ok...thus then we head for the padang.....movie screenin by class 95 fm.....talkin abt that i rmbred recently on the radio power 98....this gal who call in for a contest....afta she won the dj ask...which is the red hot radio station in spore....she confidently said "98.7"... i was like laghin ma arse...!!!!

im so so so not well yet...tomolo got drama prac...maybe call in mc for work...cannot take it....arghhh...beta sleep now....exams on mon...i beta start muggin....

August 19, 2006

im burnin at 38.9 degrees.... hee....im literally HOT....


how sick can i be......im like coughin ma heartn throat out.....ma nose running like the jam at eexpress way.....go 2 the doc???? wat can they do..subribe me med n dats it..... ma chest hurts at times...n i hv to breath constantly wen i feel like collapsing.....

but im gonna be fine....like khai said its all mind over matter...i'll get well soon i hope.... im kinda down wif maslf....i kinda sux at practice lately......

n missing gpa so much......i hate to say it lar....but i do..... if only i cud relieve that moment once again...... u nvr noe wat i feel...coz it's seldom ppl come along n understand me.....well if they do.....i feel as tho im not makin sense & toubling them wif ma overexagerated problem..........as in....i suck as a human.....lol....i a mean2 creature....living wif that name....

actually tinkin abt it....i miss te crew of gpa...i miss faezah....in ma head it cycles abt how ppl i luv think abt me.....coz i noe im workin hard to achieve ma dreams....but the QN is always
DO I MAKE U PROUD....

life.....like u noe this comin three weeks...itd be a rollercoaster ride for me....
i smtimes wish for sm1 to hold me wen im down.....well im lonely.....
now u noe.....

August 18, 2006

HOT!!!

Hot blog alert!!!
hahaha....luving this new layout.....
wohhhooo......

wat r u waiting for? tagg~!!!

August 17, 2006

im S.I.C.K..... heal me...cure me....i want ma voice i need ma energy....

3 tuff n stranous week ahead.....

so here ma killer timetable....

with effect of 28 aug....

attachment (tentative) 8-5pm daily... on weekdays

mon wed fri evenings>>>dikir trainings
tue evening>>>drama

thursday n sun evening >>> csc, freelance video editin assignment

sat n sun 11-6 >>>kpg ubi production training.....

to add....dikir com is on 3rd sept wich is ma datelin for the video editin job....thus u noe i noe....im gonna die......i pray that god gvs me the enrgy n strength for ma body to withstand such long hrs.....for these 3 long weeks.....amin

August 14, 2006

im deeply touch by asya's testimonial that i can almost cry.....hahaha...i miss her already.....haah

yesterday at afiq hse was happenin....wif karoke seession....reenactin layar andayu....n juz chillin n laughin....but the best thing hv yet to start......the sewelness sparks off the moment we're reachin YEW tee mrt.....wif a single magic word...."Accident"....hahahaha...i donno wat got over me....but that was the most hilarious thing i evr did to a kid that was cyclin the opp direction....he breaks....n den speed of....paiseh lor....hahahaha....damn....then the north-ians.... went crazy....we went to a park at woodlands...n take pic afta pic afta pic...was damn fun la....it was an exellent idea to juz chill instd of goin to the all common pasar mlm.....

n today woke up to kak ati msg...that there was kpg ubi training...so i rushed to bedok.....then work....new supervisors hah....heee....masih bdk2 lagi....lol....and ya....suzan ajak me join her modern dance performance....shud i.....since yes the big news.....KPG UBI PRODUCTION has been POSTPHONED....hhahaha...so danny lek dulu eh.....

so i think im gonna join the dance......try smth new... wen opportunity doesnt come ur way......u find another door that leads to it....hehehe...amcm....berfalsafah.....tkle angkat....n farid's is damn irritatin, callin me matrep the whole day at work.....wats his prob....lol....

for goodness sake.....tapered pants are juz a fashion wear MIS-USED by the mats population....

well as it is in a song;
so impossible as it may seems
u gotto fite for evry dream
coz whos to noe...
which one u let go...
will make u complete......

hahahha.....tired n sleepy....tomolo goin to skul at 10 to study...me???hahaha...we'll c....

August 12, 2006

im so tired but got presentation tomolo mornin...the goin to walk ard city area...then go to andayu gatherin at afiq hse....

time...
some ppl wait for it,
to heal their soul
to ans their qns n doubts
to fufill thier life...

im......waitin.....for u to come into ma life...to allow me to understand u.....to allow me to share ur life.....to answer u doubts.....to hug u wen u need comfort......to look into ur eyes...n ease ur soul......to wipe ur tears....to make u smile.....to hold u in ma arms....to make u feel special.....to plan sweet suprises for u....to walk nxt to u.....to be wif u in ups n downs..... to promise u i'll 4eva be true....to trust .....to care.... to luv u n only u....
so wen will u come???
coz im still waiting...

****************************
all blue...frozen as ice....so melt ma heart....warm ma life...shine ma days....

**********************************

it'd be fun n woohhhooo....if i can join this....

August 10, 2006

I've never been the one to raise my hand,
That was not me and now that's who I am

Everybody needs to rise up
Everybody needs to be loved, to be loved

This what we dream about but the only question with me now
Is do I make you proud
Stronger than I've ever been NOW
Never been afraid of standing out
But do I make you proud

by Taylor Hicks.....american idol 5
********************************

im facing a little confusion in life....
thus im juz gonna leave it to him to ease this mind...
im thinking too much....i'll assume that for now...
haaahaaha.....fittin bills was the hot n crispy topic for today...

u fit ma bill
so mem...do i fit ur bill....
if i do.....take me away.....

im signed , sealed, n delivered
im urs.....

or

i said no, no, no no no...
coz ure not the one for me....
*********************************
ndp over......wohhooo......update soon aite...so tired...

August 04, 2006

well felt damn tired....the whole day...as though ma body was abt to collapse anytime.....(muz be coz the late nite ar....watch sm freakin stupid movie....hard canday...abt cuttin male balls...hehe)
but alhamdulilah...im fine.....juz got back from prac.....cam today ma voicing suck ar......like pitchinn all.....today oso got kpg ubi training but tak gi ar...impossible rite to split maslf into 2....heee....

so juz check nyp webby for exams date....in two weeks time....damn...
tomolo morning kpg trainin again....im damn worried ar....but i juz gotta push this.......cmon.....elf...juz a month or so.....tun perak n kpg production..+ atachment in hand...i pray that allah will give me the strength to achieve sucess in all these area...iif i do fail....well it happens for a reason...wwat is impt is that i werk hard n the rest i leave it to him.....

btw no more presentattion....except for entrepenuership day....hahaha....cool...
hm......im juz gonna enjoy these few months....tired....who cares.....it unfair that i stop maslf from complaining....hahaha.....it strange tho.....haahahha....but i bet i still will...6 months to graduation......hahahaha.....well so it'd be......

i miss this chap of ma life most.....i will definately...its been gr8 noe all oof u in mcg especially.... the ppl in crmsc......andayu....i'll miss it alot.....im not gonna stop here la....insyaallah....continue to persue this.....

.....
lets pretend ur mine....
cmon baby we aint gonna live 4eva...
let me show u all the thing that cud do...
i noe u wanna be 2gether....
n i wanna spent ma life wif u.....
....

August 02, 2006

well presentation for ccm is abt to start.....well u nvr noe wat happen if ma grp members mark me down again this time....thus...juz smile n hope for the best.....hv fun.....coz we aint gonna live 4eva.....hahaha......

let's pretend ure mine, we can juz pretend x2 yeah...
u got wat i like..... u got wat i like.. i got wat u like..
oh cmon...juz a taste n u want more....
so tell me wat ure waiting 4....

cmon baby we aint gonna live 4eva...
let me show u all the things that we can do..
i noe u wanna be together..n i wanna spent ma nites wif u.....wif
u...

"4eva" by the veronicas

how i wish im deeply in luv....heee....